![]() The next day, he received hundreds of replies, all reading the same thing: “You can have mine.” Why do men want their brides to wear white?īecause they want their dishwasher to match their fridge and stove!Ī man inserted an advertisement in the classifieds “Wife Wanted”. What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man? Laugh more: Offensive and Inappropriate Jokes For a good laugh, look through our selection of love jokes. Marriage can be difficult, but with our hilarious wife jokes to husband and funny husband jokes, you may enjoy the lighter side of marriage. Unfortunately, she changed her mind since then. Son: Dad, I’ve heard that in some parts of the world a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her.Īmerican scientists finally found out what a woman wants. Him: “What they mean is, only an idiot would’ve married you!” Her: “All my friends are telling me I married an idiot!” He turned around and said, “So, you want me to stay?” How do I make my wife stop buying all these gloves?Ī wife got so mad at her husband that she packed his bags and told him to get out.Īs he walked to the door, she yelled, “I hope you die a long, slow, painful death.” ![]() Husband: Exactly, darling! It’s a computer, not a husband!! Wife: Dear, this computer is not working as per my command. I told him to leave me alone and when he did, I asked him why he was ignoring me.īoring husband: Honey, why are you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?īored wife: Because I married the wrong man! ![]() My son wanted to know what it’s like to be married. My wife told me to go and get something that would make her look attractive. Him: “But sweetheart, I don’t wear any glasses.” Her: “Honey, I don’t like you with the new glasses on.” They’re hard to get started, emit foul odors and don’t work half the time. So, rather than waste time, let’s all dive into the hilarious sea of husband-wife jokes and laugh ourselves silly! Hooray!! These amusing wife teasing husband jokes will make you laugh so hard. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success. One woman’s hobby is another woman’s hubby. If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say,īefore marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.Īfter marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.Įvery man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one. Marriage is when a man and woman become as one Only after getting married, you realize that those husband-wife jokes were not just jokes. ![]() We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. It’s merely an attempt to put a smile on their faces.Įvery time I get a divorce, I keep the house. These jokes aren’t meant to belittle the wife or the husband, and we don’t believe in gender stereotypes. Here are some of the best husband jokes one-liners to make your marriage more enjoyable.
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